Thursday, April 30, 2009

Who knew anything that came from the same animal that gave us tasty, tasty bacon could be so wrong?

It's that time of year again... the flowers are budding, the grass is greening, birds and bees are trying to have sex with each other, and that can only mean one thing:

It's time for a pandemic!

Ordinarily, I am not a worrier when it comes to various plagues and ailments. I accept the fact that in this line of work, since I spend so much of my time around so many germy children, that I will get sick. And I've had 4 colds this winter alone (the standard number is 1...). And then comes Swine Flu to freak me the fuck out. It's a controlled freak, to be sure, but a freak nonetheless.

The closest confirmed case of Swine Flu is probably about 200 miles away. But when you work in schools and then hear that the schools in the next largest city have been closed because of contamination, you start to get a little worried. And realistically, I wouldn't be concerned if I had a damn contract job. And what, you may ask, is the correlation between the two?

Health insurance.

Yes, my friends, Mrs. Spatula has been uninsured for almost a year. I live in fear that I will get t-boned by some fucktard while driving, or that I'll cut myself while cooking. When I fell at school and sprained my foot, and they denied my claim (at first), I about shit myself. And now there's a freakin' pandemic on the horizon and I'm not woried about dying from it; I'm worried about how to pay for it.

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